My Theme Park Nightmare & Why It Took Until Now to Talk
My Theme Park Nightmare & Why It Took Until Now to Talk
July 28, 2014. It’s a day that I will never forget. A day ingrained in my mind. A day that replays over and over in my head. A day has me bursting into tears in a moment’s notice. My Theme Park Nightmare. It’s amazing how one of the happiest places for families has now ironically become something else for me. Over 3 months later, I am now finally ready to talk about it.
The weekend was looking great. Yesterday, we had a family day at Clearwater Beach with pristine sand, happy smiling children and perfect weather. And today, we were headed as a family to Busch Gardens for the day to check out the new Summer Nights promotion. 2 kids, 2 adults, and a full day of memories were on the table. The day looked so promising.
We were taking our time, walking around and checking out animals. I noticed that my baby girl was acting quiet. Tired.
“Must be from the beach yesterday,” I thought.
I gave her extra fluids. Purple Gatorade, I remember. Snacks. We even kept her in the stroller to shield her from the hot summer sun. No problem. The hot day lingered on. It was after 12 pm before we decided to get in line for the train that goes around the park. I was tired and frustrated by that time. The train was about to leave. My husband said that we could get on if we emptied out the stroller and folded it up. Does he realize how much “stuff” we carry with us? If we missed it, we’d have to wait at the train station with 2 cranky kids for another 20 minutes.
Needless to say, we missed the train.
I didn’t realize how much of a blessing that was.
As we waited at the train station, my husband decided to take the hot and sweaty baby out of the stroller and hold her while we waited. In the shade, under a fan, Gatorade in hand, we were trying to cool off. My husband started to notice that our daughter was starting to act a little “goofy.”
“Come take a picture,” he said. I wince at the memory, my eyes misting as I type this.
Little did I realize, my daughter was in the aura stage of what was going to be the longest 3 minutes of my life. And it seemed like an eternity. In my husband’s arms, my daughter’s arms and legs started twitching. He must have just watched the odd movements for seconds before he notified me. Oh no.
A full blown seizure.
She’s never had one before. And things begin getting a little blurry in my memory at this point. I remember taking her in my arms, running around the train station, screaming at the top of my lungs for help.
I remember sitting down on a bench, screaming and crying, as I saw my daughter’s eyes rolled back in her head. She wouldn’t stop shaking. “Please stop,” I begged her. Those minutes, only about 2 to 3 minutes, I saw her whole life flash before me as I tried to choke down the possibility of brain damage if this continued. Someone, an angel of a lady, took off my baby’s shoes and put an ice cold water on her feet. Another torturous few seconds before she went limp. It was over.
By then, I’m not sure how long it took before the park medic arrived. He told me that we needed to go to the hospital right away, especially with this being her first seizure.
At this point, I don’t know what I was thinking.
“No, I think we will be ok.”
Perhaps one of the dumbest things I’ve ever said. What was wrong with me? My baby needed attention. Help. Answers. And I was too stubborn to get into the golf cart to get into an ambulance. It took some convincing, but we were taken to the nearest ER for evaluation, blood work, medical history. I cried when she got an IV and had barely moved when the needle stuck her. I cried even harder when she opened her eyes and focused on my face for the first time.
A nasty virus. Her fever shot up quickly while at the theme park, causing a full seizure. Within a few hours, we were released. Tylenol and Motrin our new best friends for the next 3 days, we went home, completely exhausted. Everything happened so quickly. Within half a day, our lives and memories changed forever.
Why So Long?
It’s taken me months to be able to write about it. I sat here with this blank page for weeks, trying to find the words.
Part of me was reliving the nightmare. I mean talk about it? I couldn’t even stop thinking about it for a month solid. One of the scariest situations I have ever dealt with in my life, I realize how quickly my daughter was almost taken from me. In an instant, her life could have been gone. I was afraid. I am afraid.
Part of me was embarrassed. 4 years of college to obtain a B.S.N. degree. 6 years of hands-on work on a pediatric nursing floor, having witnessed and treated kids with the exact situation. 5 years as a mom. I had all of the credentials of a well-prepared person for a situation like this. Instead, I was frozen. Unable to cope, hysterical at best. And I was ashamed.
Ashamed that I didn’t see the warning signs at the theme park. Tired, lethargic, not herself. I should have felt her forehead, given her a dose of Motrin (she was badly teething) anyway before we left the hotel. I should have had a thermometer on me. Maybe if I gave her more Gatorade or a better snack. Maybe if I was a more attentive mom…..I would have seen it.
What kind of nurse am I?
I had sunken into a deep sadness, probably depression. It’s taken over 3 months to forgive myself. Though I had plenty of training and experience as a nurse, I have had little to no training or experience with my own kids this close to death. It was hard to realize that in THIS situation, I was a mom first. Not a nurse. I had every right to not be prepared for this moment.
A long road to recovery, and not for her. But for me.
I still relive that day. I have nightmares about it. I cringe when I see pictures from that day. When she wears the outfit. I even recently found the picture I took of her, moments before her seizure. I immediately burst into tears. But slowly, ever so slowly, I’m learning to find the blessings in the darkest of times. Blessing that we never got on that train. What if she had a seizure while we were moving? Blessing that the staff were able to call an ambulance. The Angel that had the ice water. The doctors, the technology, our son for being so brave, our family for holding together.
It’s ironic that I am now opening up about this day here now in November. A month of thankfulness. And I certainly am so thankful, even for this experience.
It’s a day that I will never take for granted. My daughter almost died that day. But I have been given so many more days to be with her. Each day, a blessing. Now, I’ll never look at a theme park the same again.
Yes, you will find a thermometer in my diaper bag.
Have you dealt with an experience like this with your child? How did you cope?
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Judy Pennington says
Oh Lordy, which story to tell you!!! I had 6 children and more than my share of “accidents” and sicknesses. I too was a nurse. Grad from LPN school in ’71 while 7 months pregnant with my 2nd child, I’ve gone thru hyperactive kids, to one being accidentally shot by his brother with a 22 rifle, airlifted to the hospital while I had to drive my self there, surgery, and 18 days of recovery, 3 months out of school before finally having the catheter removed and being able to walk again, car accidents, injuries, one having a full blown seizure at age 3, in the back seat of the car while I was driving down the highway at 60 miles an hour, and finally the one that all parents are never ready for and dread the worst, that call in the middle of the night to tell you that your son had a wreck and was killed instantly. It’s been 8 years now since my 32 year old son died, and even though it does get easier as the years go by, it only takes a second to come rushing back again. If not for my faith in God, my family, and my church, I would never have made it thru it. Raising children is never easy, and now that they are all grown, from ages 28 to 46, now I have grandchildren and even 3 great grandchildren, so the worry starts all over again. All you can do is place them in God’s hands and know that He loves them even more than you do, and trust in his will. And pray that you never get that phone call again.
Christie says
I cannot even imagine, Judy! You are so brave to tell your story
kimberly bhatti says
I actually read this post earlier and as I walked to school to get my kids, your words just stuck with me and I couldn’t stop thinking about this post. I was in tears reading but at the same time felt like I was meant to read it. Back in October of 2014 while walking with my daughter she was hit by a car. The driver was not paying attention and just drove right into my daughter bumping her into the road. I felt anger,sadness and then pure fright thinking what ‘could have’ happened. After the accident the woman ran away. At that moment I wasn’t thinking of getting a license plate or even calling the police. My first reaction was to make sure my daughter was okay. After I got a hold of myself we went to my mom’s house, where I then called the police. I was questioned by many as to why I did not get the plate number. Its been several months now but I still can’t shake those images and I am not sleeping well at all. As parents we want to protect our children and its hard when we cannot prevent them from being hurt. Thank you for sharing your story.. it definitely touched me. God bless you and your family
Christie says
Thank you for sharing your story, Kimberly. I hope you can forgive yourself for being a mom first and an investigator second. You did the right thing
COurtney S says
I am an CNA not an RN but cut yourself a break…in that moment you weren’t the RN that you had trained to become your were that babies momma! I am so glad she is ok!
Christie says
Thank you for your support, Courtney!
Rachel says
There is nothing like a parent’s heart ache for their child. My daughter has autism and while it’s not usually life threatening, in an instant it can be. For example, children with autism tend to run away when they get upset and seek out water. This is very dangerous because they usually can’t swim. You learn to live with the fear and even have a successful and happy life. But it’s definitely not easy. I’m glad your baby is ok!
Christie says
Thank you for sharing, Rachel! Dealing with an autistic child is a whole other level of challenges and I can’t even fathom your everyday struggles
Sili says
How did I miss this?! I am sooo sorry you had to experience that! I’ve lived through 7 of those seizures and it’s something I don’t wish on anyone.
Hugs to you!
Christie says
I’m so sorry you had to experience it multiple times!! I’d never wish it on anyone, Sili!
Melissa Vera says
I think every mom panics when something is wrong with our children. Last year my youngest had her first of many seizures where she was finally diagnosed with Epilepsy so I know how scary this must have been for you. My heart goes out to you, even now over a year later I still watch my youngest like a hawk and she is almost 13.
Christie says
Melissa, Epilepsy is such a scary thing as you try to get the medicines and treatment under control. I can only imagine what you were feeling for the past year! Thanks for sharing
Ashleigh Walls says
I’m terrified that something like this will happen to my kids. I had a seizure at 21 in front of my boyfriend, we now have two kids together, and it was terrifying. I took a drink of water and it went down the wrong tube and that’s the only thing my Dr. can think of that caused it because I’ve never had another one, just lack of air. I only remember waking up to what felt like an earthquake and my boyfriend screaming my name.
Apparently I just collapsed out of my chair and started shaking violently. He did the only thing he could which was hold me so I wouldn’t hurt myself and just yelled at me to wake up. To this day he says it’s still the scariest thing that happened to him, and I watched him fall 3 stories on his back. After I woke up and felt the shaking I realized I had no idea what happened but it was something bad, I still can’t shake that feeling and I can’t imagine a child having to go through it.
Christie says
Oh my goodness! I can see how that would be so scary for you both. Thanks for sharing, Ashleigh
Lauryn R says
While this post may be old, this is the first time I am seeing it. Oh my goodness, you have me in full on tears right now! That must have been so scary! Thank goodness your sweet baby is okay. Becoming a mom has made me realize that I am not perfect and make a lot of mistakes, but that’s okay.
desiree says
i did have something happen to my son he got off a school bus and then some one threw a m 80 at him and blew half his face off and i was in lomppoc calf working on the m illatary base i got clal form grandma aas urgent as you can see i was doing my clean up n and one fo the personal said come to the base now so as i get to main part of base i had to leave asap so my boss told me get ride home pack and get back here hey sent me home dion was in hospital with bandage on his head well i was sitting on porch and my son walk out side of the house and tell me oe of the kid were out side so i went out and litetttly beat the living day light of teh kid he was 15 but fought like a man and was over 6 ft tall my dad said my brother caught the other 2 and when the cops came i told them what happen and then dad said she only here for couple days i was adult but did not look like but the ikid got put in jail for 7 year each
Penny Olson says
Febrile seizures can really take you by surprise. Cut yourself some slack. I’m glad everything worked out ok, but it can be horrible at the time.
Robert says
The febrile seizure in & of itself is benign. It is, however, an indication of a fever-inducing disease. Under such conditions, the first aid is to try to bring down the fever, and then or meanwhile work on the diagnosis.
Robert says
I had my baby niece in my lap when it occurred. Daddy, a retired general practitioner, asked, “Did you see that?” I replied, “Tonic-clonic seizure.” I’d never actually seen one as a med student — they’re so transient — but this one was by the book: Wide eyes, like “WTF is happening to me?”, then stiffening, then the shakes, then like nothing had happened. What’s funny is that years later, Daddy denied ever having seen it!
Infants are keyed-up neurologically. We’re born with hair-trigger reflexes, some reflexes we lose entirely (except we can get them back in old age as part of parkinsonism), and we can have seizures at the drop of a hat. Most of the time they mean nothing. If it’s febrile (occurring during fever), there’s your excuse right there, and they’re just an indicator that we have a fever that needs to be looked at; if you already know we have one, then the appearance of the seizure doesn’t tell you much in addition. If it’s afebrile (in the absence of fever), that’s a little bit more of a concern, because it could be the start of a lifelong seizure disorder, but usually it’s not.